Drunk plant is probably one of the funniest videos ever. Watch it -- you can fast forward to about 40seconds in to start. Nothing better than a drunk, sunglasses wearing, guitar playing plant.
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
CREEPY GAME
This is the commercial for the new karaoke type Xbox 360 games Lips. Probably one of the creepiest things I've ever seen...ever.
Brobee Song
I have no idea what this is. Apparently "Brobee" is some kind of kids show or character or something. What's important here is that you watch this video RIGHT NOW. Don't drink anything with watching your you WILL SPIT IT OUT do to hilarity. It's a "Brobee Party In My Tummy Remix" I have no idea what it is, just watch it.
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
Slovin and Allen
Watch this ridiculous "time machine" skit from Slovin and Allen. It is filled with pure hilarity.
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Thursday, September 4, 2008
The Truth About Sarah Palins Speech
Jim Kuhnhenn of the AP wrote a "fact checking" artcile on the statements made during Sarah Palin's and others speeched at the GOP convention. It's a rather interesting read when you cut through the rhetoric.
What Is This Thing?
What the hell is this thing? I saw it's picture on the video game site Kotaku. Didn't read that article, but I thought the smiling creature was hilarious. If you right click and save it, it says the file name is "sloth.jpg." I always thought Sloth looked like this:
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Wednesday, August 20, 2008
The Sexiest Female Forms of the Summer Olympics
So a list of the 50 hottest female Olympians was compiled by some website called WebTVHub. The actual list is titled "The Sexiest Female Forms of the Summer Olympics." I guess we should have seen this coming. What I find funny is that it's from a random website (random to me at least) and not Maxim of FHM or something. You can view the entire list HERE.
Now I'm going to keep most of my comments to myself because, well, just look at the list. But I will say that I do like the pic of Katerina Emmons of the Czech Republic holding a rifle (I guess that is her sport), that's hot.
I also found THIS, The 26 Hottest US Olympic Women (I guess of all time). I have no idea who created this one, but I found it on CampusSqueeze.com.
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
EngrishFunny
I thought this website, EngrishFunny was legitimately funny, so you should check it out. There's a few crappy ones, but then there are one's that say "Please do not feed the fish with your private," which I imagine is good advice.
Though I would like to say it's a pretty terrible looking site with it's yellow and brown design.
Hot Coffee On The Subway
This morning I was one the subway, or should I say crammed into a subway car. It was completely packed. And what do I see in front of me, when I can't even lift up my arms? A guy attempting to drink Dunkin Donuts Coffee.
I don't understand why people buy coffee just to bring it on the subway. Can't you just get it at work or school or wherever you're going? Why do people think "Hmm I should get a scalding hot beverage and carry it with me for 20+ minutes in a packed space where no one can move, that's a good idea." Come on, what the F. Seriously, who thinks that? You can't drink it, you have to hold it, and you may even spill it on someone. And if you spill it on me I'll knock your block off. These are probably the same people who make awesome decisions like taking the elevator to the 2nd floor or bringing bikes on the subway.
Friday, August 15, 2008
Get Barack Rolled
You've heard of being RickRolled...now prepare to be BarackRolled
Thursday, August 14, 2008
President Bush Loves Ass
Apparently, Misty May asked President Bush to smack her ass. He didn't though, it's not like he's stupid and/or prone to poor decisions or anything.
Original article HERE.
Caught by Google
Don't get drunk and pass out on your front lawn, or this might happen to you. Thank you Google street view.
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
High Police Officer Calls 911
Apparently in Michigan a police officer confiscated some marijuana and brought it to make brownies with his wife. This video below is from a Fox news affiliate playing a recording this officer made to 911. Why was he calling 911 you ask? Because he thought he and his wife were overdosing on his stolen pot brownies and that he was dead. Pretty funny stuff
The Earth Is Flat
A few days ago, there was a nice article from the BBC about people who think that the Earth is flat. Not people who used to think that...people who do think that...today. One of my favorite quotes from the article: "The space agencies of the world are involved in an international conspiracy to dupe the public for vast profit," says Mr McIntyre. "
I think I'm more amused by the claim that the space agencies of various countries are conspiring to create a conspiracy for profit more that the fact that these people are ignoring visual proof...let alone the laws of physics.
You can read the full article HERE.
Wednesday, August 6, 2008
Paris Hilton Mocks McCain
John McCain compares Barack Obama to Paris Hilton stating he's simply a pop culture celebrity. Now Paris Hilton shoots back in a video on www.funnyordie.com. I don't much care for Paris but I think this was a nice shot (good job Paris' PR folks).
FunnyorDie.com does have some pretty clever and/or funny videos if you look around.
See more Paris Hilton videos at Funny or Die
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Schlitz Returns
Beer lovers rejoice. The holy beer nectar or Schlitz is back (thanks for the news MSNBC)!
Apparently Schlitz' formula had been changed numerous times which resulted in the grossness that everyone associates with the beer. I think though, that a lot of people associate some "funness" with it from their college days...I could name of ton of people I know that do...probably because it was ridiculously cheap. Apparently this stuff is selling out in Milwaukee and stores are creating waiting lists! And by the way, what a ridiculous ad that is (posted above)!
Schlitz is a badge. Wear it proudly. Next time you're at the bar do what Farva would do and order "six Schlitz'."
And now, once again courtesy of MSNBC, I present to you, a brief history of Schlitz:
1849: German immigrant August Krug opens a small restaurant and tavern in Milwaukee, begins to brew beer and turns it into a brewery.
1850: Joseph A. Schlitz, 20, immigrates from Germany and works for Krug as a bookkeeper.
1856: Krug dies, leaving no offspring, and Schlitz takes over management of the brewery.
1858: Schlitz marries Krug's widow, Ann Marie.
1861: The brewery is renamed the Joseph Schlitz Brewery. Schlitz runs it with Krug's four nephews, the Uihlein brothers.
1871: The Great Chicago Fire destroys many of that city's breweries, giving Schlitz an opening to expand his business.
1875: Schlitz travels to Germany and is presumed dead when his ship sinks in a storm. Since he had no children with Krug's widow, the Uihlein brothers take over the brewery.
1893: The company introduces the slogan "The Beer That Made Milwaukee Famous."
1902: Schlitz surpasses Pabst as the world's best-selling beer after selling 1 million barrels that year.
1912: Schlitz bottles its beer in brown bottles, marking the first time a brewer does so. The dark color prevents light from spoiling the beer.
1920: Prohibition begins. The brewery makes soda, malt syrup and candy. It survives because the Uihlein brothers have extensive real estate holdings.
1934: Prohibition ends, Schlitz resumes production and retakes No. 1 sales spot.
1953: Strike by Milwaukee brewery workers hurts brewers like Pabst, Blatz and Schlitz, which lose market share to rivals such as Anheuser-Busch Cos. Inc. of St. Louis.
1954: Schlitz briefly rebounds to again be the world's best-selling beer.
1955: Anheuser-Busch takes over the top spot, which it still holds.
1975: Immediate family management of Schlitz ends and distant relatives and outsiders take over the operation.
Mid-to-late 1970s: Schlitz still sells well, so the new owners try to make more by shortening the fermenting process. But the beer has no foam and is flat, so managers add a seaweed extract. But that turns solid after sitting in bottles for a few months. Schlitz sales fall and the old formula is gone.
1981: Production of Schlitz ends in Milwaukee when workers strike.
1982: Detroit's Stroh Brewery Co. acquires Schlitz and sells off many of Schlitz's plants to pay for the acquisition. It focuses on promoting Schlitz' secondary brand, Old Milwaukee.
1999: Pabst Brewing Co. buys Schlitz from Stroh.
2008: Schlitz reintroduces the classic formula.
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Shalom Undertaker
I've come to the conclusion that The Undertaker from the WWE is really a Hasidic Jew. Want proof?
Let us compare the style of dress of Hasidic Jewish reggae artist Matisyahu:
Now let's look at The Undertaker:
Hmmm...shalom Undertaker.
Monday, July 28, 2008
To Serve and Eject
Well it looks like we get two posts today, because this video I saw is absolutely appalling. Apparently Friday night was an NY Critical Mass bike ride. Well the video below shows a cop running into a bike rider and shoving him off his bike.
This looked completely unprovoked and from the video you can see that no police officers or bystanders were in any danger that would warrant force like that. I can't see any defense that could be used here. The original article goes on to say that the BIKE RIDER was arrested and charged with attempted assault. Now I'm all for police leeway, letting them do what needs to be done for the job and giving them the benefit of the doubt, but this is a blatant abuse of power and things like this should not be tolerated.
Now I don't know the whole story, but from looking at that video, it's my opinion that that cop should be fired and charged with assault. (Update: even if the police were on the lookout for this guy I think they could have handled it differently, unless he was the anti-Christ.)
Original story from Gothamist.
15 reasons Mr. Rogers was best neighbor ever
This morning I was shown an article about Mr. Rogers. I decided to repost it here because Mr. Rogers is wacky and is always funny. The real reason I decided to repost it was because of the #1 reason which is hilarious.
The article comes from CNN via Mental Floss magazine so be sure to visit those sites .
Full article below:
Here are 15 things everyone should know about Fred Rogers:
1. Even Koko the Gorilla loved him. Most people have heard of Koko, the Stanford-educated gorilla who could speak about 1000 words in American Sign Language, and understand about 2000 in English.
What most people don't know, however, is that Koko was an avid Mister Rogers' Neighborhood fan. As Esquire reported, when Fred Rogers took a trip out to meet Koko for his show, not only did she immediately wrap her arms around him and embrace him, she did what she'd always seen him do onscreen: she proceeded to take his shoes off!
2. He made thieves think twice. According to a TV Guide piece on him, Fred Rogers drove a plain old Impala for years. One day, however, the car was stolen from the street near the TV station. When Rogers filed a police report, the story was picked up by every newspaper, radio and media outlet around town.
Amazingly, within 48 hours the car was left in the exact spot where it was taken from, with an apology on the dashboard. It read, "If we'd known it was yours, we never would have taken it." Mental Floss: Memorable commencement speakers
3. He watched his figure to the pound. In covering Rogers' daily routine (waking up at 5 a.m.; praying for a few hours for all of his friends and family; studying; writing, making calls and reaching out to every fan who took the time to write him; going for a morning swim; getting on a scale; then really starting his day), writer Tom Junod explained that Mr. Rogers weighed in at exactly 143 pounds every day for the last 30 years of his life.
He didn't smoke, didn't drink, didn't eat the flesh of any animals, and was extremely disciplined in his daily routine. And while I'm not sure if any of that was because he'd mostly grown up a chubby, single child, Junod points out that Rogers found beauty in the number 143.
According to the piece, Rogers came "to see that number as a gift... because, as he says, "the number 143 means 'I love you.' It takes one letter to say 'I' and four letters to say 'love' and three letters to say 'you.' One hundred and forty-three."
4. He saved both public television and the VCR. Strange but true. When the government wanted to cut public television funds in 1969, the relatively unknown Mister Rogers went to Washington.
Almost straight out of a Frank Capra film, his 5-6 minute testimony on how TV had the potential to give kids hope and create more productive citizens was so simple but passionate that even the most gruff politicians were charmed. While the budget should have been cut, the funding instead jumped from $9 to $22 million.
Rogers also spoke to Congress, and swayed senators into voting to allow VCR's to record television shows from the home. It was a cantankerous debate at the time, but his argument was that recording a program like his allowed working parents to sit down with their children and watch shows as a family. Mental Floss: Forgotten kids shows sure to give you nightmares
5. He might have been the most tolerant American ever. Mister Rogers seems to have been almost exactly the same off-screen as he was onscreen. As an ordained Presbyterian minister, and a man of tremendous faith, Mister Rogers preached tolerance first.
Whenever he was asked to castigate non-Christians or gays for their differing beliefs, he would instead face them and say, with sincerity, "God loves you just the way you are." Often this provoked ire from fundamentalists.
6. He was genuinely curious about others. Mister Rogers was known as one of the toughest interviews because he'd often befriend reporters, asking them tons of questions, taking pictures of them, compiling an album for them at the end of their time together, and calling them after to check in on them and hear about their families. He wasn't concerned with himself, and genuinely loved hearing the life stories of others.
And it wasn't just with reporters. Once, on a fancy trip up to a PBS exec's house, he heard the limo driver was going to wait outside for 2 hours, so he insisted the driver come in and join them (which flustered the host).
On the way back, Rogers sat up front, and when he learned that they were passing the driver's home on the way, he asked if they could stop in to meet his family. According to the driver, it was one of the best nights of his life the house supposedly lit up when Rogers arrived, and he played jazz piano and bantered with them late into the night. Further, like with the reporters, Rogers sent him notes and kept in touch with the driver for the rest of his life.
7. He was color-blind. Literally. He couldn't see the color blue. Of course, he was also figuratively color-blind, as you probably guessed. As were his parents, who took in a black foster child when Rogers was growing up. Mental Floss: Praise for the blind genius who invented cruise control
8. He could make a subway car full of strangers sing. Once while rushing to a New York meeting, there were no cabs available, so Rogers and one of his colleagues hopped on the subway. Esquire reported that the car was filled with people, and they assumed they wouldn't be noticed.
But when the crowd spotted Rogers, they all simultaneously burst into song, chanting "It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood." The result made Rogers smile wide.
9. He got into TV because he hated TV. The first time he turned one on, he saw people angrily throwing pies in each other's faces. He immediately vowed to use the medium for better than that. Over the years he covered topics as varied as why kids shouldn't be scared of a haircut, or the bathroom drain (because you won't fit!), to divorce and war.
10. He was an Ivy League dropout. Rogers moved from Dartmouth to Rollins College to pursue his studies in music.
11. He composed all the songs on the show, and over 200 tunes.
12. He was a perfectionist, and disliked ad libbing. He felt he owed it to children to make sure every word on his show was thought out.
13. Michael Keaton got his start on the show as an assistant. He helped puppeteer and operate the trolley.
14. Several characters on the show are named for his family. Queen Sara is named after Rogers' wife, and the postman Mr. McFeely is named for his maternal grandfather who always talked to him like an adult, and reminded young Fred that he made every day special just by being himself. Sound familiar? It was the same way Mister Rogers closed every show.
15. The sweaters. Every one of the cardigans he wore on the show had been hand-knit by his mother. ♦DiggIt! ♦Add to del.icio.us ♦Add to Technorati FavesFriday, July 25, 2008
Pineapple Express Restricted Trailer
I guess I like to post movie trailers, so here's another one. This time it's the trailer for Pineapple Express, which I'm sure you've probably seen on TV already. For some reason though I can't find the trailer that's on TV and that's too bad because the "I made a mistake" phone marriage dialogue with Seth Rogan is great.
Below is the one I think is funny. Below that one is the restricted trailer which I don't think is as funny.
Trailer I think is funny:
Restricted trailer:
I Hate Preggers
I hate the word "preggers." As in someone stating that someone else is or looks as if they are pregnant, as in "Wow she's preggers." I'm not sure I can think of a word that irritates me as much as this.
This isn't even shortening a word or creating a slang term to hide the meaning from someone. It's just deciding to create some mashed word that looks the same, means the same thing, has the same number of letters and syllables, but for some reason is a new word. There is zero purpose to this word usage.
I heard that if you use the word you're 10x more likely to get thrown in front of a train. Seriously do not ever use this word.
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
RIP Estelle Getty
RIP Estelle Getty. We will always remember you for you academy award worthy performance in Stop Or My Mom Will Shoot!, but I choose to remember you as whatever it is you're doing in the image above.
*Image borrowed from Brooklyn Vegan, check them out, cool site.
Thursday, July 17, 2008
Oooooooooooooh Yeeeeeeeeaaaaaaah!
Do you all remember the Macho Man Randy Savage? Of course you do. Well here's a promo of his from what I think is the early 80s. It is completely ridiculous and make ZERO sense. It almost sounds like he's reading random lines from random poems or something, or simply babbling offer words as they enter his head. Watch it, it's funny.
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
311
Tonight I'm going to see one of my favorite bands, 311. This will be something like the 12th time I've seen them. Funny thing is that the first time I saw them I wasn't really a fan and just went because a bunch of my friends were going. Well that show changed my mind - they are great and one of the best live bands ever. It's not that they have a particular "show" -- it's just the energy that's at the shows, ask and fan and they'll tell you what I mean.
If you're not a fan, I suggest you give them a try, summertime would work best and you can take pretty much anything of the Music or Grassroots albums first.
I'd also like to rep two of the bands I saw open for 311 years ago; 2 Skinnee J's and Shootyz Groove. And for the record Incubus fans, 311 is far superior.
Enjoy 311:
Homebrew:
Do You Right:
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
1,2,3,4 Monsters Walking Across The Floor
I have no idea why this is amusing to me but it is. A video of Fiest singing her song 1,2,3,4 - which you may know from the ipod commercial where she's in some bright blue outfit doing some odd hip/body shake dance move. Well now Fiest has redone the song for Sesame Street into a "counting is fun boys and girls" song which included the the glorious like "1,2,3,4 monsters walking across the floor."
I don't know whether I actually hate the video or love it. I can't tell whether I want to make fun of it or enjoy the fun that comes with learning up to four digits.
Video:
Friday, July 11, 2008
Come On Apple!
Today I tried to download the update for the iPod Touch (iPod Touch 2.0 update) and what did I get? NOTHING! iTunes keeps saying that I have the newest version 1.1.4 and then says that 2.0 is available and then 15 minutes later says that 1.1.4 is the latest version. WTF Apple? iPhone users can get their update but iPod Touch users cannot?
Yesterday they released the new application store, which was useless since you couldn't update the iPod until today. So that means you could BUY the applications but you couldn't actually use them or even put them on your iPod.
It should also be of note that this update is FREE for iPhone users but iPod Touch users have to pay $10 for the update. The main purpose of the update is to allow you to access the app store, so you're really paying Apple $10 for the luxury to purchase more from them later on. That's pretty ridiculous.
All of this is on top of the fact that Apple charged users $20 for an update earlier this year (January I think?), which again was FREE for iPhone users. Now this $10 updates included those. Which means you could have $10 by waiting until now to get this update. So why do you get a 2 for 1 update now, why did it have to be $20 in the first place and $10 now? The rumor is that due to "accounting practices" Apple has to charge something for an update. Okay fine, if that's the reason why $20 and $10. Why not $1 and $1 or $0.01 and $0.01?
So lets see:
-Release of the store where you can make purchases but cannot actually use what you bought
-iPhone users can get an update but Touch users cannot
-Charging iPod Touch users for an update (twice) while other get the update free
-Charging for an update that allows you to spend your money on their products
Thanks for screwing us Apple. I'll agree you have some good products but stop screwing with consumers.
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
Jamie Kennedy is Terrible
Who is the casting director that decided that Jamie Kennedy either has talent or is entertaining?
Last night I was watching the show Reaper, which most people probably don't watch, but I think it's great. Anyway, Jamie Kennedy was a guest star and he was terrible. He played the same stupid sounding stoned looking oblivious idiot character that he plays in everything he's ever been in. He just about ruined the episode. In fact I think he just about ruined television and film, that's how bad he is. I can't think of words to explain how bad he really is. He's just annoying. If I see him on anything I will change the channel. If he even guest stars in a movie I think twice about watching it.
Is there anyone who is actually like "Oh a new Jamie Kennedy show I have to catch that" or "Jamie Kennedy is on Conan tonight, can't miss it." I can't imagine the type of person who thinks he's funny or even mildly entertaining. He has got to be the (not one of, the) worst "performer" in the history of existence. I'd rather watch a baby murder ballet than 1 minute of his "comedy."
On another note, watch Reaper so it doesn't get cancelled.
Tuesday, July 8, 2008
BK Now Open On Eternia
For those who don't know, King Randor is the father or He-Man and ruler of Eternia. Last night I came across some stuff online that brings into question who this alleged King really is. It seems the King may be leading a secret life.
I give you exhibit A, King Randor:
And now ladies and gentlemen, I give you exhibit B, The Burger King:
I'm just saying, have you ever seen these two together?
Monday, July 7, 2008
The Empire Strike Barack
Haha, I found this pro Barack Obama mashups today. I like The Empire Strike Barack Best, it has the best scenes in it. It's not the best done video, just faces pasted on Star Wars clips, but like I said, it's got some funny quotes in it.
Check it out at about 2:32 for Obama's "dirt off the shoulder" move and at 4:32 to see him drive the lane. I'm surprised that I haven't seen the basketball clip before with some ridiculous headline like "Obama drives to the hoop of change" or something like that.
So if you'd like to see the video here it is (4:59 total):
Also Barack Obama as Rocky: Baracky
In other news, I think I'm going to start making some "John McCain is so old..." jokes, I just haven' t got a good one yet. If you have some Old McCain jokes send them to me HERE.
Friday, July 4, 2008
Thursday, July 3, 2008
Step Brothers - Restricted Trailer
Well this could potentially be the greatest movie in the history of the world. Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly, who both still live with their parents, become step brothers at like 40 when their parents get married. I imagine though that you should probably drink before, and possibly during the movie to enhance it's hilarity.
Watch the "restricted" unedited trailer:
"The bunk beds were a terrible idea. Why'd you let us do that?"
WTF Cable Companies
What the F cable companies. First you limit our bandwith and now you cut off services. It seems that on the urging of NY Attorney General Andrew Cuomo, a bunch of cable/internet providers are now blocking access to usenet (and thus blocking access to million of files to download). Come on it seems that these companies keep giving us less for more, it's getting ridiculous.
What I'm more annoyed about here are Attorney General's who simply do something under the guise of "seeking justice" when it's actually for press and a way to create a more publicly recognizable persona and advance your political carereer. Let's be honest here, this is a big move for Cuomo and is getting press (with highly respected outlets like this) writing about. On the other side I'm sure that the cable companies love it as it now cuts down on people's bandwith even more, unless users choose to go to a third party group that they'll have to pay for.
So what do we have here? Politician wins, cable companies win, third party companies win, consumers lose. Keep up the good work.
Wednesday, July 2, 2008
Retarded Athletes ESPN Moments
Now, I don’t mean to be a jerk about this but it’s getting rather annoying…Here’s what’s going on:
I’m sitting at home watching SportsCenter thinking I’m going to hear some trade news, see some highlights or hear that they finally realized baseball is a boring sport and ban it from TV. But that’s not what I hear. What is it that I do hear? A “heartwarming” story about a kid with no legs who got to play wheelchair basketball with some NBA player or a kid with cancer who got to meet a baseball player or a retarded kid who is infatuated with race horses.
Okay yeah it’s nice that this kids get their Make A Wish thing and I don’t what then to die or anything but I really have no interest in hearing about retarded athletes playing 6th grade tee-ball or a kid with a disease shooting free throws with Shaquille O’ Neal (and probably shooting better than Shaq too).
Yeah great, this 12 year old kid is playing ball, great success. I’m glad he’s happy but I don’t need to see it. This is something you show at like 3:30am, not 7am or 7pm. Seriously. And what’s with the team saying “We love Corky he’s the heart of the team!” Are they really going to go out partying with him when they’re seniors? Maybe…but I doubt it. Again, not being a jerk, just look at it honestly.
Why do we have to work in a PSA and/or some goodwill PR at PRIME score/highlight catch up times? I really doubt the ESPN audience is clamoring for more “heartfelt” stories. It’s also doesn’t set a great tone for the rest of the day. Come on now, you know it’s true.
Also, I’d just like to throw in there that no one cares about the WNBA either. It’s true. You know it. Get over it.
Friday, June 27, 2008
The Right To Bear Arms
I'm sure you've heard about the court case regarding the right to bear arms. What I don't understand is why people are so dead set on allowing others to have weapons. I'm not talking about small guns or rifles here, I'm talking about automatic weapons where the entire purpose of their creation was to kill other human beings.
Another thing I don't understand is why we can't just create some sort of gun control bill that works. They say "Gun don't kill people, people kill people." Yeah, okay, fine. That's great except that we keep giving guns to the people that kill people. There has GOT to be a better way to deal with this. I wish I could find statistics where someone successfully "defended" their home with a gun (that's not from the 17 or 1800's).
The entire purpose of guns is to kill people. Sure you can go hunting, but why do you need to hunt with the same weapons that armies use? Because "it's your right?" Don't be stupid. If the Bill of Rights were to be rewritten today there would be no provision that people have a right to stockpile weapons. This isn't the 1700's. We don't have threats rollings in to town trying to overthrow us these days. And we're pretty well connected, if something happens in New York we're not going to have to really on local residents to form a militia (unless Skynet achieves awareness). It's outdated and we don't need it. Now I'm all for freedom and I don't think that the government should force something on you, but I think you have to admit we have a problem here.
How many times have you heard about someone walking into a public space or a school and just shooting people for no apparent reason. Then we find out the they "didn't take their medication." Okay well there's a problem. If a side effect of you not taking medication is that you murder people I think it's fair to say that that person should not have access to guns or any other weapon. I'm sorry but that's a safety issue and no, I don't think it takes it to far or violates your rights.
Where are we going with this? What is it going to take to make people realize that guns should not be readily available to anyone who wants them? Come on NRA and gun advocates tell me that stricter rules and limiting access to guns is a bad idea?
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
We Can Make Her Better...We Have The Technology
A friend of mine found this bionic dog. I'd like to see how it walks.Monday, June 23, 2008
RIP George Carlin
Comedian George Carlin died of heart failure on Sunday. Most people may remember him from his comedy acts which included the famous 7 dirty words, his role in Dogma, or even his role on Thomas the Tank Engine. Let us not forget one of the greatest roles ever to be play in the history of acting...that's right, Rufus from Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure (and Bogus Journey).
RIP George Carlin and remember...be excellent to each other.
Sunday, June 22, 2008
Cablevision May Lose Ownership Of The Rangers
According to a report I read HERE, MSG LP which is part of Cablevision, which in turn is owned by James Dolan could lose their ownership of the New York Rangers. It seems there is a big dispute of who should control the teams website. Cablevision says as the owners they should, and the NHL says as the governing body they should. Now as a result it looks like the NHL may revoke ownership of the Rangers (we'll have to wait and see what repercussions that will cause)
Now I don't follow hockey all that close, but Cablevision also owns the NY Knicks. The best possible thing that could ever happen to the Knicks is for James Dolan to lose ownership, so hopefully the Rangers will be freed and the Knicks (and hopefully MSG) will follow. Dolan is just a guy who has cash and think it's cool to own sports teams when he actually knows nothing about the sport. All he knows is big names, which is why the Knicks are often full of players who used to be great but are now out of their prime.
I truly hope that some day NY sports teams will get an owner who cares about the fans and the city. I'm taking donations, I just need about a billion/a billion and a half dollars to make the purchase. Let's get moving on that...
Thursday, June 19, 2008
New Girl Talk Album Out...for $0 or $10 or $100...
The new Girl Talk album is out today. For those that don't know, Girl Talk is a DJ from Pittsburgh who makes original songs out of an endless number of samples. The samples are cut into tiny pieces of the song and sometimes last only seconds. Good stuff, and original too.
Following previous artists who have given away new albums for "whatever you want," the new album, titled Feed The Animals, was released today and it's up to you to decide what you want to pay for it. That deal seemed to work for Radiohead. Though the fact that they are Radiohead probably helped...even though they are drastically overrated.
I enjoyed the previous album Night Ripper so I hope this one is decent. I'm loading it to my iPod as I write this. Can you guess how much I paid for it?
You can get the album HERE.
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
IKEA
If you do any of the following:
- take a day off work
- call in sick
- wait in any form of line
- sleep outside
to be the first to shop in a new IKEA, someone should saw your face off.
Really? People are skipping things and waiting in line for the opportunity to spend their money on furniture. Does no one see how stupid this is?
This week new IKEA opened in Brooklyn (in a part that's about as inaccessible as you can get) and I've been hearing/reading stories about people who waited in line/camped out/skipped work so they could go. Come on! There one not that far in NJ and one on Long Island, so why is this such a big deal? Yeah it's nice that it's there but seriously it does not warrant this much attention. It blows my mind.
Choke on a meatball furniture waiting fools.
Friday, June 13, 2008
Dudes in London Love Each Other
So you know when people talk about how much Europeans love soccer (or football or futbol, whatever, it's soccer). Well it is outrageously ridiculously true.
Last night I was in a bar (oh sorry again, a pub) and a soccer game was on. It was Germany versus the mighty nation of Croatia. First of all the entire place was PACKED, like shoulder to shoulder can't breath packed, and everyone was glued to the TV. It was quite exciting, I saw a ball go one way and than the other for a while with everyone else stood there...riveting. So eventually one team (Germany I think) scores and the place goes NUTS -- like just won the powerball single ticket nuts. These duded are jumping around hugging each other and almost crying like little girls...I thought they were going to start making out with each other...seriously.
It's amazing how psyched they get over a goal. I guess maybe because it's an entire country's team, but still.
Also...soccer is boring.
Thursday, June 12, 2008
Loud Sneezers
Holy F'ing Christ! I don't think anything annoys me more than when people sneeze loud. Like ridiculously loud. I really have no idea why, but it's one of the most irritating things in the world to me. Today I was on a train and some guy sneezed and I just wanted to go over there and punch him in the face.
Now I realize that there's nothing you can do about, you can't control how you sneeze. But you better! I cannot control my incredible hulk like rage I feel when I hear these loud noises coming from your face. Get it under control. I don't know how your head doesn't pop off from them. I can take maybe two sneezes, three's a push. Sneeze four times though and i don't know what I'll do. Seriously, watch your faces...
Monday, June 9, 2008
Off to London
I'm off to London this week. I'm sure I'll have a bunch of things to talk about regarding how they do things differently and why our way is better. I'll be sure to let you know. All I know is that I better see someone do this:
Watch Eurotrip. It's a highly underrated movie and you probably already the song Scotty Doesn't Know by Lustra. Seriously though, if you don't like Eurotrip what the hell is wrong with you?
I better see a bunch of British stereotypes, and I hope it doesn't rain. I welcome your thoughts on British stereotypes and suggestions on what to do in London. Oh I just thought of this too...I hope I get to meet Sir Charge.
For your convenience, you can watch the awesome clip of Vinnie Jones opening beer bottles with his eyes right here:
Thursday, June 5, 2008
Mr. Pokey
HAHAHA. I had to post this too. I mean come on just look at it! I'm not even sure what it really is. I guess a window painting for a guinea pig? Mark off your calendars, today is funny picture day.
Exciting Cuisine
What is this (not not a school for ants). Apparently a Mexican restaurant who's mascot bears a striking resemblance to Mario. Whatever it is, it is a most awesome picture. Look how exciting it is. Who wouldn't want to eat a place where a dude in a sombrero serves you tacos and head sized mugs of beer? SUPER PARTY RESTAURANT of the year I say...
Wednesday, June 4, 2008
What Drink Should I Get
I was just at Dunkin Donuts and I saw something that I thought was weird. This guy came in and bought a Gatorade. Why he's chose to go to a donut/coffee shop instead of the cheaper better stocked store right next door I don't know.
So this guy proceeds to purchase his green Gatorade. Then goes back to the display and looks all the drinks over again and put back the green one and picks up a red one. Then stands there looking at the red one and finally decides to put the red one back and take an orange one.
I have no idea why this was so interesting to me that I had to stand there and watch his every move, or why it's so vivid in my mind. It was just strange to see him buy something and then repeatedly second guess himself AFTER he bought it. Then again when he tried to leave he couldn't figure out how the door worked, so that might have had something to do with it. He kept pulling on the push door (clearly a push door) even when it was clear that it was not going to open that way. He pulled the door on the outside to get in, why was exiting such a problem? Smart guy.
Tuesday, June 3, 2008
Bikes on the Subway
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Why do people insist on bringing bikes onto the subway? A bike is for transportation juts like a subway. So it's a little confusing to me when you have to combine them. Where are these people going that carrying a bike down stairs, through a gate, cramming it on a crowded train, carrying it through another gate and then back up the stairs is easier than just riding it there? Did you mistake a bike for a suitcase somehow?
NYC is not that big, where are you coming from or going to that you just can’t use the bike or the train? It’s especially irritating when I see people decked out in stupid bike gear and get on the subway with me and then get off with me like five stops later. That’s EXACTLY what the bike is for and they even dressed for it! COME ON!!! Bikes can go anywhere that the train can. You’re not going over mountains, you don’t have to swim through water so just get on the goddamn bike to where your going.
Stop taking up room for five people, and especially stop bringing bikes on the subway during rush hour. I wish I could drive my car into the subway and be like “Oh I’m just getting off soon, there was traffic, hope I’m not taking up too much room.” Seriously. Think about what you’re doing.
Monday, June 2, 2008
Hillary You've Got To Go
Hillary Clinton you have got to go. You are losing by all measures and you continue to press on.
There is now almost no way that Clinton will receive the democratic nomination for the presidency but blah blah blah she keeps talking and talking about why you should vote for her. If she is nominated that is not democracy. The people have not elected her but she doesn't seem to think that's important. You can't have elites selecting candidates (though some might argue that's the way it is anyway). If she is behind in delegates, states, and popular vote how is it right to select her as the candidate? If that does indeed happen then democracy and freedom is dead. It means your vote counts for nothing and those who "know better" will simply decide for you. Doesn't sound right does it?
Ask yourself this people...Do you want whatever this thing is as your president?
Hillary Clinton you have got to go. You are losing by all measures and you continue to press on.
There is now almost no way that Clinton will receive the democratic nomination for the presidency but blah blah blah she keeps talking and talking about why you should vote for her.
Ask yourself this people...Do you want this as your president?
Saturday, May 31, 2008
Kimbo Slice
I'm watching the Kimbo Slice MMA fight NJ right now. This guy is huge and scary, and apparently pretty good. This is the first of his Elite XC fights that I've seen and he's faring well. Tonight he's taking on James Thompson. MMA is getting bigger and bigger. UFC has the Ultimate Fighter on Spike and tonight's Elite XC fight is on CBS.
For those that don't know, MMA is mixed martial arts (UFC is arguably the most popular) where you fight inside a cage utilizing a variety of of fighting styles. Kimbo Slice is a fight who gained notoriety through underground fights posted online. He's pretty badass but the question was could he really be an MMA fight. HOLY CRAP -- he's just almost literally punched Thompson's ear off! Kimbo wins. I guess that answers it - he's now 3-0.
Kimbo was on his back and in a bit of trouble in the first round. It was more of a brawling fight than Kimbo's normal fights but in the end he came through. Kimbo won in the 3rd round via TKO. I don't know what happened but Thompson's ear was HUGE and Kimbo popped it which poured blood everywhere, it was ridiculous. He's got some pretty ridic punches. He could probably punch a baseball and get a home run.
Friday, May 30, 2008
Mommy Why Is There A Server In The House?
This was shown to me yesterday. If you go to Circuit City's website and browse home servers there's apparently a PDF that they have on the page explaining why having a server at home is good. You can get to the PDF buy clicking HERE and scrolling down.
It's a ridiculous book aimed at children which helps them cope with issues such as other kids making fun of them for having a server at home instead of in an office. Finally someone is helping kids cope with these issues! I highly suggest that you read this. It says things like "When a mommy and daddy love each other very much the daddy wants to give the mommy a special gift...so he buys a stay-at-home server" and "Offices are why big people get grumpy and say bad words."
Check out the complete slideshow online HERE (thanks Gizmodo).
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Star Wars Gansta Rap Videos
I'm rather busy today so I don't have much time to post one of my glorious and insightful posts. So instead you get two Star Wars gangster rap videos.
Unfortunately I couldn't find the cartoon version on YouTube for some reason so I had to link to Atom Films who forces you to visit their site.
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
Striped Chips Ahoy!
Does anyone remember these things? Striped Chips Ahoy! were quite possibly the greatest cookies every created, rivaling that of the almighty black and white cookie. For those of you who like the weird red/green/yellow cookie thing, that's just ridiculous and they are terrible. No one seems to remember these...what a shame.
These cookies were Jesusly delicious.
Monday, May 26, 2008
Weezer - Pork and Beans Video
Holiday weekends equal lazy posting habits. So here's the new video from Weezer for the song Pork and Beans of the upcoming Red Album. I love it. It's a great song and the video is awesome too. The video is a spoof of a bunch of popular YouTube vids (even though South Park really beat them on this). You have to see all the related videos to to truly enjoy the Weezer one. I don't have them all but some of them are: dramatic chipmunk, mentos experiment, afro ninja, GI Joe PSA, 155 t-shirts, leave britney alone, all your base are belong to us, Miss South Carolina, Numa Numa, crank that dance, evolution of dance, chocolate rain, popozao, daft hands, daft bodies, peanut butter jelly time, and charlie the unicorn (in the background at the end).
Friday, May 23, 2008
Stop Celebrity Name Mashups
Dear Guy Who Creates Celebrity Couple Name Mashups,
If you ever create another couple mashup name like "brangelina" or "tomkat" I will come find you and smash your face in. Seriously, it's the most annoying thing ever. I've seen things where they'll take two people's names and just remove spaces from in between them, let's say Tiffany Smith and Alex Johnson and they'll be like "oh their new name is alexandtiffaayjohnsonsmith." Really? This is very irritating to me and it's got to stop.
I'm pretty sure that you are single-handedly destroying society. If you continue to do this I hope you fall onto a pile a searing hot rusty things.
The Cleveland Show
Well Quahog's local deli owner Cleveland Brown is getting his own show. I wonder what it'll be like. Cartoon character spin offs are amusing and apparently he's living somewhere with a family of bears living next door. It probably won't be as good as Family Guy but most likely better than American Dad.
Watch the video with it's nice song. Cleveland would do it for you.
Thursday, May 22, 2008
American Idol is Terrible
I didn't get around to a post yesterday, so let me apologize to my loyal reader. Now on to American Idol.
Can someone tell me what the big deal is with American Idol? Do fans of the show claim to be fans of "good music" and that's why they watch it? Wasn't there a rock guy once and a country person and most people are just pop music? I don't mind pop music when it's good or catchy, maybe even just acceptable but we're getting ridiculous here.
I don't understand it. Everyone sits there and watches unknown people sing other peoples songs and everyone loves it no matter what people sing. What's even worse is that they just stand there, it's not like there's some big spectacle going on. It doesn't matter if you win as long as you're just on the show. People seem to buy whatever the show tells them to. You could probably have an American Idol radio station where the songs are only from people who have been on the show and it would probably get good ratings. Even is a single is good I'm sure they couldn't sustain an entire album.
Music is in a terrible state as it is. I don't see why people can't find their own music this day and age. Find something you actually like and not what TV tells you to like. I just don't get it. It's certainly NOT good music. This is like a Josie and the Pussycats movie mind control thing (shut up it's a fun movie). Kelly Clarkson is kind of nice though, in pop terms.
Hey American Idol fans, I heard there's a big concert going on at the bottom of the Grand Canyon. Just find the highest point and jump to get to it. It'll be nice...for everyone.
In other news, apparently New Kids on the Block are popular again. Okay.
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Dumb stars, spoiled brats and PETA
So apparently a few weeks ago, Lindsay Lohan was at 1OAK in NYC and let with some random broad's fur coat. The coast something like $10,000 - and for that fact alone the owner should be punched in the face. Also, it's May, its not like 10 degrees out. I don't know but isn't a fur coat supposed to provide warmth?
So she got her coat back and is now suing Lindsay Lohan for "damages." Come on now. She sounds like she'll be a great asset to society in the future.
The kicker here is that not PETA has allegedly sent a letter to this woman (I guess her name is Mash Markova) blabbing that you can't own fur because it's animals blah blah blah. F'ing Christ PETA, shut the F up. PETA you are stupid and ridiculous...you probably don't get invited to a lot of parties.
Here's the letter that PETA sent:
To: Masha Markova, c/o Merrill Cohen
Dear Ms. Markova,
We at PETA have read with interest about your distress over Lindsay Lohan supposedly stealing your fur coat. Has it ever occurred to you that neither you nor Lindsay are the rightful owners? That coat belonged to dozens of animals who were electrocuted, gassed, strangled, drowned or beaten to death just so you could try to appear wealthy. Ms. Markova, people who wear fur simply show that having money and style don’t go hand in hand. Please take 5 minutes to watch this video, hosted by former fur wearer Martha Stewart, who had a change of heart about wearing real fur when she saw what the animals go through. Perhaps you, too, will find your conscience and consider donating your fur coat to PETA, as have Mariah Carey, Kim Cattrall, and hundreds of others who don’t want animals to be fashion victims. We give them to the homeless, and you would even receive a tax credit for the donation. We look forward to your reply.
Dan Mathews
VP, PETA
*I am not a news source and am only commenting on items that I have seen in the mainstream media. I also don't believe that seals and/or fuzzy animals should be punched in their faces/heads.
Monday, May 19, 2008
Mustaches AGAIN!!!
Holy God man! On my way home today I saw another woman who had a mustache. It looked though that she at least tried to get rid of it...by shaving it. So I was standing there staring at this woman's face that looks like she just came out of a poor excuse for a Schick commercial. Now the question here is if you're a woman and have a mustache and shave/wax/pluck/whatever it, do you not notice when it starts to grow back? That might be even worse. Come on ladies!
♦DiggIt! ♦Add to del.icio.us ♦Add to Technorati FavesWii Are Fat
Man how lazy is everyone that we have to be tricked into exercising. Wii Fit comes out this week (maybe today, who knows). For those that don't know, it's a game that lets you do yoga, push ups, jogging and other "fun" exercises. That's right push ups are fun. In the picture above you see kids who are "playing soccer." Why don't they just actually play soccer? Is everyone going to just stay home from now on and virtually do things? It's an interesting game and I can see lots of ways it can be used but even the things that promote being active still locks you inside in front of a TV. I bet a lot of people stop going outdoors and "socialize" with their friends online and compete there.
It's likely that even though this game promotes exercise, we'll still see more kids that end up looking like this:
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